Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Change I can believe in!

No, this isn’t a post about Obama’s campaign slogan. You hear and see enough of that these days that you’ll probably think something is wrong when the yard signs and TV ads come to an end in November. No, this is a post about facing change and believing in it. I don’t normally like to write too much in regards to personal matters, but I decided to face a fear and do something a little different. Anyways, getting a story out in the open can be therapeutic, you know?

My wife and I found out recently that our daughter is far-sighted (means she can’t see things up close). She is one and half years old and now has to wear glasses. Initially, I was bothered by the whole thing. I was irritated, even a little angry at God, over this. I was asking under my breath, “Why should a kid so young have to wear glasses?”, or “There’s no way she’ll keep those things on!”

It was change. Change I didn’t like. Change I didn’t want to like.

Seeing her in glasses for the first time was challenging. They changed her whole appearance. She wasn’t the same looking little girl I was used to looking at. Feelings of unfairness and frustration boiled to the top. This was such an injustice. To top it off, we had to hold our daughter down, and force the glasses onto her tiny head; all the while she screamed and cried. It was just too much. Before I knew it, I was praying Psalm 143,

O LORD, hear my prayer,
listen to my cry for mercy;
in your faithfulness and righteousness
come to my relief.
(Psalm 143:1 NIV)

If only God would touch her and heal her so she wouldn’t have to wear glasses anymore. That was my idea of how God could hear my prayer and come to my relief. Somehow God was able to help me see the bigger picture. This was about helping my daughter live a better life. God is not going to heal her, not that He can’t or won’t, but that is not the change He is bringing about in all of this. Actually, now that I think about it, in a way God did heal her by giving her glasses. She can see now. Apparently she can see pretty well too with them on, because she is now to the point where she lets us put the glasses on her. She has also been looking in between her toes for toe jam. I guess she can see that now and wants to take care of it herself. The glasses are working and I believe in them. The glasses did change her appearance, but for the better. She’s a cutie!

The glasses also changed me. They unmasked selfishness in my prayers and behavior, which led to the discovery of selfishness in my heart. This led to me praying verse 2 of Psalm 143,

Do not bring your servant into judgment,
for no one living is righteous before you.
(Psalm 143:2 NIV)

1 comment:

eric said...

Thanks for posting this, Tim.

Claire is super cute!